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Getting Wet: Waterproof Vibes

by Thomas S. Roche

For me, water and sex are like peanut butter and jelly. There's nothing sexier to me than seeing a lover luxuriating under the spray of a hot shower or amid the bubbling jets of a hot tub. Remote swimming holes and river rafting trips always make me wish everyone around would just tear their clothes off. My fantasies can be kicked into overdrive by the reflection of light off the glistening sheen of a lover's sweaty body -- be it in a sauna, in a gym or in bed.

It's only natural, then, that waterproof sex toys are one of my favorite things in the world. Once upon a time, erotic toys weren't designed with moisture in mind -- go figure. But things got much better once the adult industry realized that many people like to romp in the shower, pool or while running through the sprinklers. Now, there's a great variety of toys you can take along on your next beach trip so you can stage your own 21st-century reenactment of From Here to Eternity.

My favorite waterproof toy to use with female partners is the Water Dancer, the aquatic version of our immensely popular Pocket Rocket. It's fully immersible, and can be paired with our Pocket Rocket Sleeves to increase your pleasure when it's used for vaginal insertion (don't use any toy without a flange for anal insertion, above or below water). The Water Dancer falls toward the middle of the scale in volume and intensity -- but keep in mind that noise will rarely be a problem when your vibe is underwater. My favorite thing about the Water Dancer is that its head features three nubs, which provide a nice, mildly bumpy texture. Even though it only has one speed, you can get a wide variety of sensations out of this toy. It's inexpensive and extremely portable -- and because it's fully immersible, it's easy to keep clean no matter where you're using it.

Another inexpensive and fun waterproof vibe is the Safari Thong Vibe. It's a pair of G-string panties that feature a strategically placed pouch housing a tiny cordless vibrator. Since logistics can sometimes get a little awkward when you're having fun in the pool or hot tub, this versatile vibe can be a great blessing. It keeps both partners' hands free for other endeavors -- and if you're adventurous, you can even wear it at the beach since it's ultra-quiet. While the vibrations are not as intense as those of other vibes, the Safari Thong can still offer very focused stimulation.

My favorite "smoothie" style vibe for underwater play is the Torpedo Vibe, for the simple reason that it's much more likely to stay put when used for penetration. Things can get pretty slippery in the water, especially if hot tub jets or shower massagers are involved. Let go of a typical smoothie-style waterproof vibe like the iCandy or Turbo Glider and it slips right out. The Torpedo Vibe won't stand up to magnitude-7.1 quakes, but it can certainly stay inserted through a tremor or two.

For women who like G-spot vibrations, there are a couple of waterproof vibes ideally shaped to provide it in the bath. The Clitter Glitter G-Spot and Sparkle Splasher are my two favorites, both falling midway in the intensity scale -- but there's an awful lot to be said for theTidal Wave 1, with its representational shape and undulating ridges. The Tidal Wave 2 is my personal preference between the two, however, because its shape allows safe anal penetration as well -- and where can you get "dirty" if not in the tub? Neither one of these toys provides especially intense sensation, because they're both made of jelly rubber, a material that doesn't transmit vibration as efficiently as hard plastic, the material used in most other waterproof vibrators.

If you're using your vibes for underwater insertion, don't forget to use lube. It may seem counterintuitive to use lubricant when you're underwater, but it becomes even more important -- because water can wash away your natural lubrication. Because water-based lubricants will be swept away by shower massagers and Jacuzzi jets alike and oil-based lubes will leave residue in your tub or pool filter, the best lubes for underwater play are silicone-based. Silicone-based lubes will wash off with soap but not with plain water. Eros Lube is our longest-lasting lube and lasts great under water. Wet Platinum is another great silicone lube. Both of them have water-based counterparts, so make sure you buy the right kind. And never use silicone-based lubes with silicone or Softskin Toys -- mixing silicone lube with these materials can quickly wear out or damage the toy. Hard plastic, latex or jelly rubber toys, however, are great with silicone lube. Since most waterproof vibes are hard plastic, silicone is definitely the lube of choice for fun in the water.

If you're looking for a fun book to read aloud to each other in the bath or hot tub, there are two choices -- both waterproof! Aqua Erotica: 18 Stories for a Steamy Bath is a fiction anthology with erotic stories themed around water; Hot and Steamy: Erotic Baths for Two provides tips and ideas two people can use to share sexy baths. Paired with our waterproof vibes, either of these books can create a dramatic reading that leaves you dripping for more!


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