The Happy Ending: Erotic Massage For Lovers
by Diana Cage
An erotic massage is not just your average rub down with almond oil and Yanni playing in the background. This particular type of massage ends with a full release as they say in the business (also known as a happy ending). The trick here is to build the intensity of touch, stroke by stroke, using all the tricks you have up your sleeve, until your lover is a little pile of turned-on goo. Then get them off in whichever manner they prefer. I guarantee the recipient of this gift will look at you with little carton hearts floating out of his or her eyes for weeks to come.
- Gather your tools
You'll need a few supplies for this activity, so plan ahead. Gather clean hand towels, massage oil, lube, candles, and a few of your lover's favorite sex toys. Recommended sex toys include: a dildo with a G spot curve (G-Twist Vibe is a good one), a Pocket Rocket, anal beads, a silicone butt plug (like the Golden Boy), a slim, straight dildo for anal penetration (Silk 1 will work nicely), latex gloves, and condoms. If you are giving this massage on the floor you will want a cushy workout mat as well. You may also want some wine, bottled water, and light snacks for after. It's important to have everything within easy reach so that there's no need to break the mood.
- Dress for sexcess
This is erotic massage people, so dress the part. Figure out what your lover most likes to see you in, and wear it. You are part of the present and you should put as much effort into looking delicious, as you will into getting your partner off. For ladies, lingerie is always appropriate. Go extra racy; it's Valentines Day after all. Choose something shiny, crotchless, glittery, or trimmed with marabou. For men, try sexy boxer shorts and a white tank, or maybe sexy special occasion underwear, and a robe. If it were me receiving the massage I'd want my partner wearing boxer shorts and electrical tape on her nipples. So maybe base your outfit on that.
- Set the scene
This isn't a quickie on the kitchen table kind of sex activity. It requires a little prep work. First, decide where you'll be giving the massage. Since you probably don't have a massage table in your house, and a bed is too bouncy for real massage, setting up a cozy little mat on the floor is one option. Futons also work well. Essentially what you want is a comfy but firm surface that allows you easy access to your lover's bod. Cover whatever surface you've decided on with clean towels and place a few extra hand towels within easy reach for wiping up oil and lube. Light candles. Maybe burn some incense. Crank up the heat. Put on sexy music; my favorite is any seventies R&B, especially Ohio Players. But go with what works for you. Avoid anything new agey, unless you actually like it.
- Be a giver
You want to make the evening special, so don't just blurt out "Hey, I want to rub your naked body and then masturbate you to orgasm!" Instead, surprise your baby by leading him or her blindfolded into the cozy little erotic massage love den you've created. The sex toys should all be displayed nicely in plain sight, perhaps lined up on a clean towel. But don't point them out. Don't forget to tease and draw out the excitement. Ply him or her with wine, and maybe some chocolates to get the mood flowing. Then dash into the bathroom like Clark Kent and change into your specially chosen sexy superhero massage outfit. Strip your lover slowly and lead him or her down onto the massage mat. He or she should start out lying face down. The room should be warm and comfortable.
- Start slowly
Pour some oil into you palm and rub your hands together to warm it. Begin with the mid-back using long firm strokes to soothe sore muscles. You don't need to be a massage therapist -- any type of intimate touch is going to feel good. But pay attention to your movements, don't be sloppy or fast. Think of your actions as foreplay. Rub your hands up and down your lovers back; stopping to apply extra pressure anywhere you feel tension. Think of the mid-back as the center of the body, and work your way outward from there. Rub his or her shoulders and work your way down the arms. Then do the buttocks and work your way down the legs. Apply more oil as you go so that there is very little drag on the skin.
- Get to the good parts
As you massage your partner, pay special attention to his or her erogenous zones. This activity is a combination of massage and teasing. As you rub the mid back lightly graze the sides of the breasts. Tell her how beautiful she is. Work very slowly and don't be shy about vocalizing your enjoyment of her body as you touch her. Talk dirty if your partner finds that exciting (and really, who doesn't?). Rub her butt and slip your hand down between her cheeks and lightly stroke her anus and vulva. Add more oil to your hand and very lightly penetrate her anus. Rub the backs of her thighs in a kneading motion, moving her legs further apart. With a male partner, stroke the small of the back and buttocks. Slip your hand between his cheeks and graze his anus and perineum. Stroke the underside of the testicles. Do not speed up, and do not concentrate solely on the genitals. Make sure to incorporate the rest of the back and legs.
- Now do the front
Ask your partner to turn over and kneel behind him or her cradling the head in your hands. Rub the neck with firm stokes as if you were lightly pulling her head away from her body. Place her head gently back on the pillow and work your way down the arms making sure to knead gently all the way to the ends of the fingers. Then slowly work your way across the torso, gently stroking her breasts and stomach. Work across the hips. Lightly graze the genitals. Stroke his penis a few times, or lightly drag your fingers across your female lovers clit. Continue to work your down the body to the feet, massaging and kneading the bottom of the foot and pulling gently at each toe.
- Work your way up again
Once you are done with the feet it's time to work your way back up the legs. Knead your partner's body slowly, staying with your massage rhythm and push the legs apart as your rub her or him. Massage the insides of the thighs for as long as you both can stand it. Are you talking dirty? You should be. Hopefully at this point you've built your lover up to a fever pitch of arousal and she's dying for release. If your lover enjoys anal penetration, you may want to turn him or her back over at this point. If you are going for a straight-up handjob then face-up is fine. Wipe the oil off your hands with a towel and squirt some lube into your palm. Stroke the erect penis or clit, communicate, ask them how it feels and what they would like next.
- The happy ending
Now it's time to employ the sex toys. What happens next depends on you and your partner's sexual preferences. He or she may want oral sex, or might want you to continue your handiwork. Another suggestion is to hand your female lover a small vibrator (like a Pocket Rocket) while you penetrate her with your fingers or a dildo. If she's an ejaculator, use the dildo with the G spot curve. If she's not an ejaculator, a curved dildo might make her into one. Your male lover might enjoy a lubed-up handjob with the addition of anal beads or a butt plug. Actually, your female lover might enjoy that too. Go with what feels good and gets everyone off. It's a special occasion, so experiment with new toys and techniques. Afterwards, keep the energy going by showering together to wash off all the massage oil. Then crawl into bed and have raucous sex for the rest of the night.
Look for more How-Tos by Diana in upcoming issues of the GV Magazine!